Parapluie
by Amonl'isa
Summary: When boredom strikes, two girls get the most genius idea... That involves cutting Dib's hair. And that starts a very crazy, very interesting vacation into motion.
1. Chapter One

**Parapluie**

"And now if you turn to page 421," Mr. Chezie announced to the class, which was looking short. Short two people, two very important people. But those very important people were not there, and so their acknowledgement in the classroom is unimportant. Instead, those very important people weren't in Nevada, or California, or even Idaho! They were in a place, that some may know as… The Twilight Zone.

Perhaps not exactly the sci-fi show that people who don't have lives have grown to love, but the two important girls, now they have genders, were located in a world very few could admit they had been to. A world that surpassed the glass of a box, and very literally. A world where you needed to slip past the hard barrier between you and the pixels of a television, and check yourself into the world that is different then your own – the world, of the television…

Darlene sighed, sitting on a bench near her friend. "There's nothing to do, I'm bored."

"Yeah, I am too…" Her friend, Lorelei, replied, pulling her magically appearing bookbag to her side. "Any suggestions?"

"Nope." Darlene sighed once again, having done this already once before. Lorelei pulled out a notebook, opening it to a random page. "Well, we could… Torment Zim," You see, they were in the world of Invader Zim, "Annoy Dib, hurt people, scream randomly, dance in an intersection like the PCD, talk about random subjects that involve Jhonen, watch the new years eve party with My Chemical Romance," Lorelei paused once again to make a small, involuntary squealy noise, "Or…"

"Or?" Darlene asked, obviously uninterested by the already exhausted topics of choice, "Anything _new_?"

"We could…" Lorelei turned the page, examined it, then turned to the back of the booklet, "Chop off Dib's scythe…"

Darlene's face turned into a mischievous grin as she took the book from her friend, "Is that seriously in here?" She asked, reading the page. It was seriously in there.

"That'd be awesome!" She said, jumping up from the bench in triumph, now having something to do.

"We need scissors, and it has to be night time…" Lorelei pointed out, being the one to plan, and not be spontaneous at all. She pointed to the horizon, however, indicating that it would soon be about time for Mysterious Mysteries to come on. "He'll be in bed soon, we can do it then."

"Sounds good, but then we'll have to wait…" Darlene didn't seem to happy with the idea of waiting, though Lorelei shrugged it off by standing up and fumbling through her bookbag, muttering something along the lines of 'I know I keep something sharp in here somewhere…'

Darlene, meanwhile, had started waking toward Dib's house, Lorelei in tow – still trying to find a sharp object in her bookbag. "So how long do you think it takes for him to get to bed?" Darlene asked, curious.

"And you _shouldn't_ know," Lorelei snickered briefly, only silencing after Darlene shot her a death glare. Darlene had started up an unusual liking for Dib, and Lorelei, being herself, wouldn't act hurt about it. So instead she made jokes. "Honestly, I don't know myself." She added shortly afterwards, looking at the houses down the block.

Eventually they found Dib's, and walked straight in – not bothering to knock, or ring a doorbell, but instead they just barged in defiantly. Darlene was very proud of this. Dib was seated on the couch, watching TV – Mysterious Mysteries to be exact.

"Oh hey!" He greeted happily, smiling, "You're just in time for Mysterious Mysteries, this one is about Bigfoot and…" He was cut off by Darlene, who just sat by him abruptly, Lorelei seating herself on Darlene's other side.

Mysterious Mysteries went by for a while, before Lorelei placed her bookbag on the couch, getting up and walking toward the kitchen. "Got any food?" She yelled out, not bothering to turn around. "I'm hungry."

"Me too," Darlene realized after Lorelei had pointed out, finally coming to terms with the fact that she hadn't eaten in a while. "Got anything vegan? I need to lose some more weight."

"Um, no…" Dib said briefly, too involved with his show to care about much else. "We have waffles…"

"Waffles!" Darlene called in a Gir-like tone, busying herself with finding the waffles. Lorelei would have offered to help, but she had an utter disdain for the evil, stuffing-filled waffles ever since… But that wasn't important. Instead she looked around the kitchen, pulling open drawers in search for scissors. "There aren't any heeere," She whined impatiently, walking across the kitchen to the other set of drawers, with a slight wiggle in her hips as she walked.

"Aha!" She called shortly after Darlene finished her waffles, pulling out a pair of scissors. "Bingo."

Dib walked in, yawning. "Oh, you're still here?" He asked, having only now begun to realize there was a world outside of Mysterious Mysteries, now that the show had ended. "You'll probably want to leave soon, I'm gonna be going to bed… Unless you want to stay?" He asked, rubbing his eyes from under his glasses.

"Staying would be nice," Lorelei grinned, elbowing Darlene. She sent another glare at Lorelei, punching her in the shoulder. Lorelei recoiled, rubbing her shoulder. "We'd love to."

"Okay, blankets and stuff are over there, sleep wherever you like." He muttered and headed upstairs. "_Whereeever you like…_" Lorelei echoed, but ran before Darlene could punch her again.

They went to the closet and grabbed up some pillows and blankets, laying them out near the couch. Though they both decided not to sleep on the couch, just 'cause.

Soon the lights went out, and all noise from upstairs seemed to quiet down. Gaz was apparently not there, or something, because they hadn't seen her the whole time. Or maybe she was just waiting in the corner to strike at some unsuspecting kid…

"You think he's asleep yet?" Darlene asked, looking at Lorelei.

"I dunno. It's a shame that Alex couldn't come… Too bad she has the stomach flu."

Darlene nodded in agreement and got up from her spot on the floor, creeping up the stairs. Lorelei pulled out the pair of scissors and followed her up. They stopped outside of Dib's door, listening in carefully. They heard no ticking of keyboard buttons, no clicking of mice, and no moving or shuffling of any kind. Instead there was just the low, droning snore. "Hehe, he snores."

Darlene and Lorelei crept in quietly, Lorelei with scissors in hand. She liked Dib, yes, but that liking for him had diminished slowly after Darlene had decided she was going to like Dib too. So now they were all stuck in this crazy love-triangle-with-two-lines-hanging-off-of-it thing. When Lorelei was just looming over his bed, she took out the scissors and grabbed his hair carefully, taking the scissors and…

Snip!

She dropped the now cut hair and snickered, Darlene having to shut her up in fear of waking Dib. Quickly did they scurry down those stairs, replacing the scissors and diving into their makeshift beds, all in a fit of laughter.

"It's going to be very interesting when he wakes up in the morning."

"Oh how interesting it will be…"

A/N: Lorelei and Darlene are Greenjellohead's characters, not mine. IZ is Jhonen's, yay.


	2. Chapter Two

**Parapluie**

"I have to pee!" Lorelei announced happily to the world.

Darlene gave Lorelei a very funny look as she skipped toward the bathroom.

Meanwhile, upstairs, Dib was awakening from a very pleasant sleep. He had a wonderful dream, a wonderful dream about Zim. Now Zim and wonderful were not always to be used in the same sentence, but Dib got to try out his new Alien-O-Terror straitjacket. The dream had ended wonderfully, where he had become famous, loved, and got all the women.

Though he had noticed one thing…

His head seemed lighter.

"Hm, must've been a really good dream…" He shrugged, stretching. It was then that he felt something… Something fuzzy. Something… Rat-like!

"Eek!" Screamed Dib, like a little girl. He hopped off his bed with such speed he could have challenged a racehorse.

Meanwhile downstairs…

"Eek!" Darlene heard from upstairs, pondering what had just happened. Had Dib gone insane yet? Had he awoken to find a mutant bear in his room? Or had all the mirrors in his house suddenly become possessed by some poltergeist? She didn't know if she'd ever find out…

"Or maybe," She said aloud to herself, "he noticed his hair."

"What's that?" Lorelei asked, having finished her business in the bathroom – and now she had tons of black-and-red eyeshadow on.

Meanwhile, again…

"Wait, that's not a rat." Stated Captain Obvious, walking slowly back to his bed. "Then what is it..?"

He poked his pillow, to see if the black… thing would move. It didn't. So he picked it up, stared at it, and then adopted a look of horror. "Oh my god…"

Picking up his glasses, he ran to the bathroom, staring at his reflection in the mirror. "EEK!"

Meanwhile, once again…

"EEK!" Came the call from upstairs.

Darlene and Lorelei started snickering. "Y'think he just figured it out?"

"Yeah."

They smiled, though wiped it away as he ran to the head of the stairs. "My haaaaair!" He whined, "My beautiful haiiiir!"

Lorelei and Darlene stared, for only now they had seen the horror of what they had done. Dib's hair was… Well, buzz-cutty-ish. A very scary look for Dib.

"WHO did this?" He growled, tiny hands clenched into fists, despite the fact he was still wearing alien PJs. So he looked _very_ tough.

"I don't know," Darlene stated bluntly. Though the directors called "Cut!" And so the scene stopped. When it restarted, it started a little differently…

"WHO did this?" Dib repeated, feeling a very strong sense of deja-vu.

"Lorelei did it." Darlene stated, pointing.

"What? Oh… Okay yeah, maybe I did."

The next scene was a very mad Dib chasing Lorelei out of the house.

Later on in the day, Darlene had found Lorelei sitting on a bench eating truffles.

"So how was your day with _Dib_?" She asked, popping a bite of chocolatey goodness in her mouth. "I didn't spend it with Dib."

"Then where were you?"

"Barnes and Noble."

Now, anybody who would have heard this conversation would have gone 'Oh, she went to a bookstore, cool' but anybody who knew Darlene, and was named Lorelei, would know that she was actually talking about a very different subject. In fact, Lorelei and Darlene knew each other so well, that they had made their own language.

"You know," Darlene said randomly, "That four out of five Americans admit to showering with people?"

"Disturbing… Keep talking."

"Yeah, I read it online. All these guys admit to wanting to shower with celebrities and stuff."

"Who'd you do it with?" Lorelei asked, smirking as she ate another truffle.

"Do _what_?"

"You know…" Darlene gave Lorelei a sour look.

"I mean showering, stupid." She grinned, shrugging. "It has to be a celebrity."

"Zim." Darlene stated bluntly, shrugging. "Who'd you do it with?"

"Me, myself, and I. The idea of sharing a shower is… Disturbing. 'Sides, you'd end up burning poor Zim."

There was a long, very long pause. It was so long, that even the birds became silent. Until… A lady with bright pink hair, with an iPod turned up way too loud, came dancing by with Milkshake playing on her iPod.

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and their like 'It's better than yours,'" Darlene started singing absent-mindedly.

"Damn right, it's better than yours." Lorelei chimed in, and before they knew it, they were singing Milkshake.

"La la, la la l a, the boys are waiting," By now they were singing all-out, when a certain green boy walked by.

"Eeeh? Darlene-human? These HUMAN boys are waiting for whaaat?" Zim asked, raising a brow in confusion.

This sent a screech of silence through the park. The birds stopped singing in tune to Milkshake, the girls standing a few feet behind Darlene and Lorelei had stopped dancing, even somewhere in the world – the iPod stopped playing. And somewhere, somebody's call JUST GOT DROPPED, just like that!

"Um… It's a song," Darlene tried to explain, all while Lorelei was falling over in laughter. Though soon afterwards, the birds started singing, the iPod started working, people kept dancing, and somebody discovered the brains to change their cell phone service.

"A song!?" Zim called, nearly screaming. Darlene nodded and shuffled through Lorelei's bookbag, looking for her own iPod. "Here, listen."

She turned it to Milkshake and tried desperately to find Zim's ears, which he didn't have any. So instead she just rested the earphones near his antennae and turned the volume down low.

"Hm… Hm? HMMM?" He 'hmm'ed as he listened. "This soong, this is interesting. What is this… 'milkshake'."

Lorelei stared.

And stared.

And stared some more!

"You don't want to know…"


End file.
